Tuesday, October 31, 2006

Halloween

I didnt play any poker last night. After I got home from work, I relaxed and ordered some pizza for the Monday night game. After eating a bunch, I got tired and went to bed around 8:30. the plan was to be fully recharged for the week to log a bunch of hours at the tables, but I am feeling more tired today than yesterday. Hopefully it is just a slow start, but I should have taken a vitamin this morning. I took one two days in a row and felt really good…I might start to make that part of the daily regimen.

I think I would just like to set a weekly goal of 90-100 sngs. Enough blogging for right now, I will be playing tonight and giving updates.

Work is winding down for the day and I am feeling very focused on playing poker tonight. I know the Suns are playing their first game of the season tonight, but I need to make up for last night. If I can log a solid 3 sets in before the game I should be set. I am promising myself that if I am winning at the end of 3 sets, I will fire up another. I need to play more when I am winning, less when losing...seems obvious doesn't it?? Try it!! It is much harder than it sounds!

Well, I played about 10 sngs and was down 2 buy ins, watch some of the suns game and then fired up a set of 4. Ended the night up almost 2 buy ins...so was a very nice last set. I played well, patient and caught a few cards. Was brutal early when my hands were getting outdrawn...damn flushes. I lost to 3 rivered flushes...I realize its all part of the plan, but I took them in stride. I am getting much better about taking beats and just rollin with it. Another winning night, up over $55. Alomst have the roll over $1k! I am happy I got about 10 in tonight...looks like there are plenty people on Full Tilt to make it worthwhile to keep firing them up until 10:30...there were still over 21k people on the site when I am writing this. Hopefully I can start hitting the gym and logging 6 tables!

Monday, October 30, 2006

October 30, 2006

Had a good weekend. A bit disappointed in myself because I still did not hit the very attainable goal I set for myself. The odd part is that after I played a few sets 3- and 4-tabling, I remember saying to myself how easy it would be to hit goals if I can 4-table. I mean, 3-sets and I have 12 sngs played…play a 4th and we start to push 20 in a day, which is a really good number for me. Maybe I need a partner in crime…someone that plays a lot of sngs and I can see them do it, but for some reason I have a mental block. I know it has to do with results-oriented thinking and being happy I am up for the day, but I need to focus more on the number of sngs played, NOT the amount I have won.

I hear stories of people going from the $11s to the $109s in months…and I have run the numbers and know I could jump up within a few months too if I could hit my projections. It might be tough for me to hit my projections this week because I am wrapped up in sports lately…Monday night football tonight, then Suns basketball games Tuesday and Wednesday, and then a great college football match up on Thursday. I would like to log 12 a night, but we shall see. Once I can 6-table, that would only be just over 1 hour of work a night…that would be pretty amazing. Just for those that are not numbers oriented, let me break it down to what 12 and 18 sngs a night would equate to.

I am assuming an attainable, yet respectable ROI or 12%

12 sngs a night:
360 a month
$1850

18 sngs a night
540 sngs a month
$2775
When I jump to the $60, those numbers change to $3,078 and $5,617 respectively. Now we are talking. Previously, I think my over-confidence dropped my ROI significantly when I started to 4-table. I was still able to make money, but my return was dropping. I can feel the difference in my level of concentration. While there are still the unavoidable bad beats, it is much easier to take lately because I know the game I am playing is the game I envision in my head…I was unable to execute it before, but now I am in the right mindset to do what is necessary to bring my game, and my returns, to the next level.

Sunday, October 29, 2006

October 29, 2006

Getting a later start than I wanted, but went 0/3 and was card dead...when I did get in, I was in with the best, just never held up...not bad, hoping my luck gets a little better next set. $36s on FT take forever to start.

Just finished up my last set of 4...needed to fire them up quickly, so i started 3 $36 and a $24. The first two i finished up I won took 2nd in the other and bubbled on the last...nice set after starting 0/3. Woulda been huge had I cashed in the final one...but very happy with the way they all played out. I was big stack on most of them...played patient and my hands held up and i won a few coinflips. Gonna try to get another set in...

I didnt get another set in...I need to get over this hump. I always find a distraction. I think part of it is that I am up and satisfied...instead of going for the kill and a huge day, i pack it in and figure its good enough...so the only time i ever log a lot of sngs is when i am having a losing day...and thats just plain stupid. I will get over this, but i just cant wait until i can get a new monitor. I think around the holidays or just after I will have to invest in a new one and start to 6 table...

This damn gambler's mentality...I want to hit the tables quick and run. That is my blackjack strategy and it worked well for me. I need to disconnect poker from gambling because I have the edge...i need to continue playing when my game is tight...it was TIGHT tonight and I didnt play more. what is my problem!!!

Saturday, October 28, 2006

October 28, 2006

Everyone is hitting their draws against me today...fucking unreal. Trying to stick with it...so far, not affecting me too much.

I am getting very unlucky today. Sticking with it...trying to remain clear headed...just need a few hands to hold up and will be fine.

Buckled down late and hand a few hands hold up...just zbout broke even for the session...i think i lost the bonus they released for me and a little more, but thats not too bad. I had a really bad run to start my set, so i am glad i was able to finish strong and continue to play winning poker as I took some nasty ones. I am gonna take a break and start up some more later...In another 10 minutes i will upload my HHs into tourney manager and see how it all shakes out.

I think the problem with my HHs from full tilt is that if you try to upload them before they are complete, i think it messes up the file and the end is created on a different file...so it messes up the HH. I am being patient and will see if this solves my problem.

I think waiting solved the problem...sweet.

I started up the first of my next set...hoping to play for at least an hour and a half...so looking to get in a min of 6, hopefully closer to 10.

Fired up 4 sngs...trying to get back into 4-tabling...

Solid first set...had one sng where i got sucked out on twice and finally the 3rd nasy one knocked me out...sometimes you have to figure you played well, thats all u can do.

Finished up my first set 4-tabling with 2 2nds and a bubble...played extremely well. My level of focus is there...gonna fire up another set.

I got sidetracked and was reading some articles online...so never got that last set fired up. If i got one more set it, that would be 20 for thei night...not too bad.

Friday, October 27, 2006

October 27, 2006

I cant get over how different my attitude is towards poker right now. Now I see why my game was break even at best over the past month or two. I took a very cavalier attitude towards the game...like my lower limit sng game could never be -EV...could it? I mean, I used to to grind the $77s, how could I not dominate the $22s? well, its pretty simple stupid! You took an arrogant approach to playing and didnt give it your best effort.

So, now that I feel my mental focus is where it needs to be, i am so excited. I can feel the game coming to me...in a previous post, i was thinking about how I havent come that far in my poker game, but now i might have to reconsider. this break really has opened my eyes and given me some perspective. I just got a bunch of books from party poker and I am ready to grow my roll and start expanding my game. now, i hope i can maintain this level enthusiasm and focus.

I cant wait to play this weekend. I never really have played a ton in a weekend...I am going to try to log 60-75 sngs this weekend. I will post periodic updates on my progress.

Side note here...I am seriously starting to put together a plan to move outta the country. Nothing too crazy, and its going to be a 10 year plan...but, here are my thoughts.

the more i see of this country, the more i want to escape. do i really see it being better anywhere else? Not really, but i definitely dont see it any worse. and, if i can live a more independent lifestyle at a fraction of the costs, while not being bombarded by the american media, i think that is definitely a step up.

My goal is to take some of my poker winnings and do two things with it. One - find other places to make some money online. there are tons of casino bonuses that you can clear and it is actually positive EV when you break it down - assuming the game is a fair one...and that might be a bad assumption.

Two - I would like to start some sort of internet business. It doesnt have to generate a lot of money, but it would be nice if it could net about $1k a month. outside of this country, that kind of money is pretty darn solid and might even be able to sustain me...so that is something i am looking to develop so there is even less pressure on playing poker. regardless, i dont think i would even want to build a big business/internet business because then it would just become more work, feeding the greed, and defeating the purpose of getting out of the country. I am looking for a simpler life.

Thursday, October 26, 2006

October 26, 2006

I am working out the kinks with the developer of the Tourney Manager software. It is great and he is very responsive. I would recommend it to anyone that would like a piece of software to track their progress and results.

I started playing some $36 sngs last night on Full Tilt. I feel that I have adjusted to the 9-man tables and different blind structure. I just cant stop thinking that I should be playing the $60s. However, I need to keep things at a slower pace and work my way up. the $36s offer plenty of $$ to the winner and I need to continue to get back into it before I get too greedy. Bankroll building is not something that can be rushed - it takes time and consistency. I usually take a very conservative approach to building a bankroll and never crap out once I hit a certain threshold. I believe this time will be no different because I never play outside of my means. The first few months, I am going to be accumulating my rakeback in my Neteller account and once I clear all my bonuses, I will start to make deposits and build my roll a bit more quickly. After I reach the $60s, when my bankroll reaches $2000 at a minimum, is when i believe things will start to get exciting. It really is hard to stay patient while I move back up the ranks, but humilty is a huge part of poker and long term success.

So, reading a lot of poker blogs, i am continually surprised that people update so infrequently. Poker is stressful and lonely work...i mean LONELY! If you dont have poker friends you know what i am talking about. To speak passionately about poker, your gameplan, and your goals to non-poker players, they will either listen and then tell you to pick up a new hobby. Or, they will just wait until there is a lull to change the subject - bottom line is no one wants to hear it. so you figure this out and never talk about it...it is hard to keep all of this stuff internalized and i use my blog to spew out my excitement as well as my frustrations. it is therapeutic...

Last night was a winning night...I believe I logged about 10 sngs, but I cant be sure because I am not a big fan of full tilt's hand histories. as i mentioned earlier, they are not uploading properly into the tourney manager software, so i cannot count them via the software. I believe i counted 11 new ones, but I really dont know. I am sure a fix will be available in the next day or two and I will be happy once again. until then, i need to concentrate on my day job. After the gym tonight, its poker!

A few notes i wanted to document.
- I need a bigger monitor
- I need to get back to 4-tabling profitably
- I need to only 2-table currently

I went back to the first few months of my blog and read a few of my entries. I have decided that I am only slightly ahead of where i was when i started this year...at least in terms of my poker game. I believe much of this was due to work, but the other part is from bankroll constraints, ie taking money out to pay bills. It is really disruptive to your game because as you start to generate more money, if you do not move up, it stunts your poker growth and boredom isnt far behind. i think that is part of my problem.

I have read a lot of blogs where the person went from rags to riches in a year. I believe my intellect affords me that opportunity, but my desire might not be there. I am pretty mentally drained when i get home from work, so logging 2+ hours at the tables is pretty tough for me. I am anxious to see what I could do if i were properly bankrolled and able to log 3-4 hours a day while 4 tabling. that would definitely be the right number of sngs to make substantial money. when i had the opportunity to do this, i blew it...took a wicked downswing early and lost my nerve.

my gameplan is to play out the rest of October, reassess, and set some goals for November and December. getting back into poker is kinda like riding a bike...you dont forget, but you arent quick as good at it as when you left...I am going to try to push myself harder this time around...learn from my mistakes, and make a push to support myself through poker. my first goal is to break the $1k mark in my bankroll ASAP...i am just one really good session away from doing that...

Had a nice session...was up $80 and still had my last sng open. Was playing so well tonight...i would love to continue playing, but i need to think about bed...i was on the bubble, had a dude all in with my KK vs A4 suited and he spiked the A on the river. seems like those damn weak aces always get me, but i never seem to hit with it...but overall, a good night.

Wednesday, October 25, 2006

October 25, 2006

I am excited to feel the poker bug in me again. My only fear, and part of the reason I took a break, was because I started a new job and wanted to focus on it. Well, I hope I can balance everything. I love my job, but unless I can make a little more, poker will be a part of my life. If i could get a $20k raise, I would set poker aside...it would be just a hobby.

So, back to grinding and I am pretty damn excited about it!

As anticipated, I am thinking about poker while I am at work...this is not good because i cannot focus on work then. However, while mulling over stats and numbers, it reminds me why I was so "addicted" to poker before. The money is just so crazy. I read a lot of blogs about people that are winning a lot of money and it just is crazy...the amount of money young kids are throwing around...I just hope they have the good sense to put some of it away.

Anyway, I am setting some goals for myself. I am so excited to be tracking my statistics again. Software is such a blessing! I am going to be playing a combination of $24 and $36 sngs for the foreseeable future. I used to grind the $77s on party, but I am slowly getting back into it. I cashed out all my bankroll and its sitting in neteller, but i put $600 in Full tilt for the bonus and I am hoping i can grow my bankroll without ever having to reload...I also want to start to develop a more well rounded game...i think reading some of the poker books i bought would help.

Off the top of my head - my goal is to log 1000 $24 and $36 sngs before moving up. Not 1000 of each, but a combination. if i find that I am dominating at the 500 sng mark, then i will move up to the $60s. I am also playing around with my target # of sngs per month and havent figured out what would be a good number. I would like to see about 250-300 a month, but I used to 4-table and was thinking about adding more...so If I start to 4-table again soon, I am thinking 400 a month would be a good number...plus, i am playing turbos...i used to play regulars. this is fun and exciting...Tonight, i will start 2 tabling and if I am playing well, move to 3. I am sure i will be 4-tabling in no time. BOTTOM LINE: 350 sngs per month is the bare minimum i should be shooting for. If i ever want to grow a bankroll and get it to where I can support myself, i need to get used to logging a lot of sngs, and 350 is a drop in the bucket!

Mad at myself right now cuz i flopped a set and it folded me cuz i was paying too much attnetion to another table...cost me a buy in.

Not a bad night. A little bad play by me tonight...starting to overplay on the bubble...need to get that under control. Once I reel that in, I will be happy. I would play more, but I was up more after 2 sngs than I am after a bunch more. Plus I got my first $20 released from Full Tilt, so I think I only won a few bucks tonight...but logging tables is what is important...

I wasnt able to focus on more than 2 tables today. I think the small size of these tables is making it hard for me to see how much each player has in front of them...eye strain is becoming a problem, so i will have to get a better, bigger monitor.

Looking forward to tomorrow.

Tuesday, October 24, 2006

October 24, 2006

So I am at it again...had aces twice today and cracked both times...not off to the start i wanted, but I feel I am playing well. I can't wait until I start to log some more significant numbers of sngs so I can determine if i am playing a profitable game...hard to tell. I feel good about it, but never can tell until the money starts coming in over the long run.

I remember why I hated poker before. Man, I am playing really well, getting in ahead and losing. At least I got to heads up this time. The break really helped because it doesnt bother me nearly as much as it did when I was grinding. However, the memories are starting to come back and the emotions that I felt...thankfully, like i mentioned, my emotions dont come up to the surface like they used to. Either it is me improving my level of control, or just the benefit of taking a short break. I think it will be important to distinguish which one it is because if its the former, I will be very happy. It will mean another step overcome in my journey...if its the latter, then it looks like I have some more work to do....regardless, back to the tables...

I'M BACK, BABY!

I have been questioning my game because I have been experiencing a lot of bad beats and just horrible luck. But, after a while you start to get sick of hearing yourself say it. I mean, come on, I am aware it is very easy to fool yourself, so I try to be as objective as possible when evaluating my game. I feel I am playing solid sng poker again. I qualify that because I realize sng poker is not poker...its a more mechanical style that takes some skill on the bubble, but thats about it.

Currently, I am playing the $22+2 turbos on Full Tilt. They are pretty laughable, so I am glad to be playing and eating a lot of fish...I have tourney manager up and running and will start tracking my stats again. when party changed its format and they wouldnt upload into sng tracker, that made me lose focus because i need to look at the numbers to stay interested...let me restate that because it is so important, I NEED TO SEE THE NUMBERS TO STAY FOCUSED! What that means is that I need to keep solid statistics if I am going to do this long term. I cannot take a cavalier attitude towards it. After I stopped keeping stats and obsessing over my game, I took the attitude that if bankroll keeps growing, who cares how quickly it grows or what my ROI is. That complacency is what causes games to erode to barely profitable or -EV. I am promising myself that I will be as diligent now as I was before. It's time to make some money!

Monday, October 16, 2006

October 16, 2006

I am no football coach, but I understand a few things about football. One is that when you are a good team, you usually get one chance to win the game. The Cardinals have had their one chance the past 3 home games we have gone to and pissed it away each time. It really is sad...soo sad and frustrating. A team that is soo close, I just dont know what the problem is.

I took tonight off from poker to go to the Monday Night Football Game. What an amazing game...too bad it went against us! Bears 24 Cardinals 23!

Sunday, October 15, 2006

October 15, 2006

I deposited $600 in Full Tilt, so I am going to be trying to get playing on Full Tilt. They have a good rakeback deal there, so I might start trying some at Poker Stars later. I just want to find the place where I will be logging and grinding most of my tables. For now, rakeback wins.

Well, I played about 6 sngs...not really sure. I have to adjust to the new blind structure on Full Tilt. It threw me for a bit, i had to make adjustments because I was getting too aggressive too fast. There are far more intermediate blind levels than on party...i mean, they dont double like on party, they go from 20/40, 30/60, 40/80, or something like that, instead of just doubling...so it took a little adjusting. I finished strong with a first and a second...full tilt seems cool...cant wait to log some more tables this week...i really gotta get back into poker! i make too much money playing to turn my back on it.

Anyway, I felt better later in the session...finally didnt overplay my hands and get too aggressive. no poker tomorrow...MONDAY NIGHT FOOTBALL BABY!

Monday, October 09, 2006

October 9, 2006

I played 6 sngs. Have to admit i played much too loose my first couple...played well the last few. my final two sngs i took 3rd and 1st. played well in the one i took 3rd...pushed with 44. i couldnt believe it when i got called with Q10 offsuit. Truly unreal! Ended up realizing that if i win the final sng, i would be up the vig i lost last night...thankfully I took it down and won my first sng in a while...back to my even 100. feeling pretty good...i am ready to do some more of this...cant wait until the legislation BS gets sorted out.

Sunday, October 08, 2006

October 8, 2006

Well, I cashed everything but $100 out of party. Gonna wait to see what happens. I started to play some $11s and played well. hands just arent holding up...its weird, like i am card dead for days, then i make it to 5 left, blinds 200/400 and i finally see a big pair, KK. I raise, get one caller, flop come 868, i figure no ace, i push, of course he has A8o. thats the kind of shit im talking about...

Played 4 sngs and took 2 3rds...so lost vig. not bad. i am back to playing a tight game preflop. I just wasnt able to find the groove before, but now i think my game is coming around...still not where i want it to be, but getting closer. I cant wait until this online poker ban bullshit blows over so i can figure out where i want to start amassing player points. I have been wanting to jump to Poker Stars for a while, so now it seems like a great time assuming they are available to US-based players. If not, i will look for a site with the best rakeback deals and largest volume of players. If i go to Stars, i will sure miss rakeback.

Monday, October 02, 2006

October 2, 2006

Well, What a time to try to find focus on poker...it appears the legislation is actually going to have some affect on my life. Those fuckin crooked politicians messing around where they shouldnt again. Right now, its all speculation and posturing...and there is over reaction online. I will wait a few days until the smoke clears. most reputable sites are restricting deposits and cash transfers among US-based players. Some say the legislation will not affect the their customers...I sure hope its all talk, but if Party goes away, and Poker stars does too, then i will have to find the most popular new site because all the fish will school there...kinda sucks, but too early to tell. lets see how it shakes down.